One of my guiltiest pleasures is countdowns and I'm not they aren't only reserved for New Years Eve.
Despite my incomprehensible minor fear of basically any animal, one of my favorite shows is The Most Extreme on the animal channel.
http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=animal+planet+most+extreme+&aq=f
Watch any of them and learn which animal is the has/is the most extreme mother/hunter/cat/workaholic/athletic/appendage chosen by an unseen group of judges. Watch them and TRY to not watch it until the end. Which animal is the best?
I love listening to the radio still and even though the number one song will probably another Rhianna song with slightly different rhythm and even slightlier different lyrics, I HAVE to know what Billboards top 40 is for the week.
And what's my new obsession?
http://1000awesomethings.com
It reminds me of the great things in life that bring so much happiness like cleaning lint traps, taking your pants off, pulling a weed and getting all the roots out, the clicking sound of anything winding up, and of course, watching cream go into coffee.
Be happy! :)
Monday, February 21, 2011
Sunday, January 30, 2011
BEWBS
We all have them to some degree. Unforunately/fortunately, I was given more than my fair share. All those pre-adolescent years wearing mommy's high heels and wishing I had boobs to look more like a woman has turned against me in the largest ironic twist possible. The fact is, I HAVE LARGE BREASTS. May my story be a cathartic experience for you: beware of what you wish for, you just might get it...ten-fold!
I don't remember the day that I realized I had large boobs. It might be my tactless family loudly informing me during my very sensitive years. Training bras were a thing of a past and spaghetti straps was going to be paired with a white strap (the only color bra I had at the time). This awkward stage couldn't get more awkward except for the fact I literally had NUNGA NUNGAS when I had to run the perimeter of the school for Physical Education.
The most embarrassing part of my middleschool life wasn't actually in school. I was on club swimming and breathing heavily on the wall. As I was clinging on the wall hoping my coach didn't see me skip another 100m. A kid in the other lane (about 10) asked, "did you get surgery for your chest?" Needless to say, I avoided hanging out on the wall so I didn't have to talk to him anymore.
But everyone makes fun of me now. My friend Sonja dressed up as me and I dressed up as her this past weekend. Before leaving she said, "should I stuff my bra?" in true seriousness.
But these fun bags aren't always so fun to deal with!
Struggling to be one of the guys is never easy, and no one takes you seriously when you have clevage a mile long.
Recently I played a beach tournament. There was a last minute addition to the team so I sacrificed a my shirt and opted to take a different gray I owned. IT was v-neck and low cut. No need to explain, just let the pictures explain to you.
I will forever make turtlenecks look slutty. So here is a video to give you ideas on what to call me the next time you see me. Odds are, I'll reluctantly look at you with laser for eyes.
I don't remember the day that I realized I had large boobs. It might be my tactless family loudly informing me during my very sensitive years. Training bras were a thing of a past and spaghetti straps was going to be paired with a white strap (the only color bra I had at the time). This awkward stage couldn't get more awkward except for the fact I literally had NUNGA NUNGAS when I had to run the perimeter of the school for Physical Education.
The most embarrassing part of my middleschool life wasn't actually in school. I was on club swimming and breathing heavily on the wall. As I was clinging on the wall hoping my coach didn't see me skip another 100m. A kid in the other lane (about 10) asked, "did you get surgery for your chest?" Needless to say, I avoided hanging out on the wall so I didn't have to talk to him anymore.
But everyone makes fun of me now. My friend Sonja dressed up as me and I dressed up as her this past weekend. Before leaving she said, "should I stuff my bra?" in true seriousness.
But these fun bags aren't always so fun to deal with!
Struggling to be one of the guys is never easy, and no one takes you seriously when you have clevage a mile long.
Recently I played a beach tournament. There was a last minute addition to the team so I sacrificed a my shirt and opted to take a different gray I owned. IT was v-neck and low cut. No need to explain, just let the pictures explain to you.
 | ||
| Oh look, a guy is sitting on a girl and killing her, oh wait HI BOOBS |
 |
| Whoa, I hope that dude clears over those girls. OHAI BOOBS COMING OUT OF NECK |
I will forever make turtlenecks look slutty. So here is a video to give you ideas on what to call me the next time you see me. Odds are, I'll reluctantly look at you with laser for eyes.
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Why my childhood should be a sitcom
One of the greatest things about being raised by my grandparents is the fact that I was basically raised in Vietnam (minus the hunger, humidity, guerilla warfare). I basically ran around in circles for hours broken up with eating and watching TV. Sounds like your childhood? Let me tell you why I'm the next "Everybody Hates Chris" show. But instead, it would be "Everybody is indifferent about Annie" but since the title probably won't catch on, I'll just have to settle with some sort of inspiration after I tell my stories.
Once, I got lost at Target, basically a mother's and child's greatest fear. My mom is really funny and nice, but when it came to dealing with me, she was always annoyed. I was always so tired and I never cared so when I went to target with my mom, I usually went to the toy aisle as she stocked up Playtex Maxi pads (true story, she literally bought 50 packages once. It was on sale and she filled an ice chest we were planning on buying as well as the surrounding areas within the cart. Sooo muuucchhhh scanning) Anyways, I went everywhere and I couldn't find my mom and I was convinced she forgot me, and I contemplated walking to my gmama's house. I even paged her on the intercom. TWICE! I was about to cry. And of course, since I had NO COMMON SENSE at that time, I thought she died within the clothing corrals and no one can find her because she's so little. Then I saw my mom at the cash registers and seeing that I was crying, she got really pissed off that I got so emotional for nothing. She pretended she didn't know me, left the store with me following and didn't look at me like we were strangers. I'm pretty sure I was old at this point. Like 13....Speaking of store incidences, I split my eyebrow open at a store near our house ducking under a metal thing and then proceeding to hit my head against a corner of the table. When I asked my mom if I have a bump on my face, she proceeded to start screaming. I got 9 stitches that evening and when people asked if I was crying because I was feeling a lot of pain, I replied with "I DON'T WANT THEM TO SHAVE MY EYEBROW". It was hard to believe that this blubbering mess was so vain, but she was. Afterwards, my mom told me she never got to buy those pants that were on sale and held myself accountable for her lost of the sale item.
Once, I'm pretty sure strangers came up to my parents and asked to take pictures with my sister. Arguably, she was adorable.
but I really thought that they would take a picture of me afterwards, but I literally stood in the back. unnoticed. in the rain.
There probably wasn't any rain, but that was exactly how I felt. Like in a Christmas movie special and a little boy goes into the 'what if' situation and sees the outcome if he chooses one decision over the other. He sees the happy family that he's not part of around the xmas tree smiling and having a good time and he was creeping at the large bay windows outside in the cold. I was that kid.
They probably thought I was a hobo child by the looks of my teeth (or lack thereof)
While my aunt was talking to strangers at the park. I interrupted the conversation by saying "I'm Annie, and I'm shy". I'm an idiot
Once, my partner in crime (my cousin Paul +1 year than I) decided that it was a good idea to express ourselves . By painting. A wall. with my aunt's makeup. A few bottles of nail polish, countless eyeshadows, and blush+ blush brushes later; MASTERPIECE. My aunt resented us. My grandma had to repaint the entire room.
Lastly, Asian superstition. I've always grown up with weird crap put on me and weird sayings to cure myself of things. For instance, once, my grandma chased after me with some sort of substance in a bottle to rub on my huge bruise. When I asked her what it was, she said bear bile. BEAR BILE! WHO OWNS THAT?! HOW DO YOU COLLECT THAT? I don't know, but if you ask my grandma, she will have all the answers. to everything. ever. As an adult, I actually have a voice in what I want to be done to my body, but as a child, I had to endure some nonsensical remedies.
As stupid children, my cousin and I loved running in narrow corridors and slamming doors. As a result, we always had bumps and bruises, especially on our heads (OHMYGOSH, IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW) anyways, big bumps on out heads are usually hidable with hair, but not the ones on your forehead. What's alleviates the booboo? Ice pack? kisses? no. HOT KNIVES. I kid you not, after propelling my face into a wall, I'm usually greeted with a hot butcher knife. Held against my will kicking and screaming, my grandma would have just heated a meat cleaver, salted my bump (i'm not making this up) and then touch the flat side onto the bump 3 times. Why. I cannot tell you how counter-intuitive it is to put something painfully hot onto something that was already painful, but look at me now! :)
Once, I got lost at Target, basically a mother's and child's greatest fear. My mom is really funny and nice, but when it came to dealing with me, she was always annoyed. I was always so tired and I never cared so when I went to target with my mom, I usually went to the toy aisle as she stocked up Playtex Maxi pads (true story, she literally bought 50 packages once. It was on sale and she filled an ice chest we were planning on buying as well as the surrounding areas within the cart. Sooo muuucchhhh scanning) Anyways, I went everywhere and I couldn't find my mom and I was convinced she forgot me, and I contemplated walking to my gmama's house. I even paged her on the intercom. TWICE! I was about to cry. And of course, since I had NO COMMON SENSE at that time, I thought she died within the clothing corrals and no one can find her because she's so little. Then I saw my mom at the cash registers and seeing that I was crying, she got really pissed off that I got so emotional for nothing. She pretended she didn't know me, left the store with me following and didn't look at me like we were strangers. I'm pretty sure I was old at this point. Like 13....Speaking of store incidences, I split my eyebrow open at a store near our house ducking under a metal thing and then proceeding to hit my head against a corner of the table. When I asked my mom if I have a bump on my face, she proceeded to start screaming. I got 9 stitches that evening and when people asked if I was crying because I was feeling a lot of pain, I replied with "I DON'T WANT THEM TO SHAVE MY EYEBROW". It was hard to believe that this blubbering mess was so vain, but she was. Afterwards, my mom told me she never got to buy those pants that were on sale and held myself accountable for her lost of the sale item.
Once, I'm pretty sure strangers came up to my parents and asked to take pictures with my sister. Arguably, she was adorable.
There probably wasn't any rain, but that was exactly how I felt. Like in a Christmas movie special and a little boy goes into the 'what if' situation and sees the outcome if he chooses one decision over the other. He sees the happy family that he's not part of around the xmas tree smiling and having a good time and he was creeping at the large bay windows outside in the cold. I was that kid.
They probably thought I was a hobo child by the looks of my teeth (or lack thereof)
While my aunt was talking to strangers at the park. I interrupted the conversation by saying "I'm Annie, and I'm shy". I'm an idiot
Once, my partner in crime (my cousin Paul +1 year than I) decided that it was a good idea to express ourselves . By painting. A wall. with my aunt's makeup. A few bottles of nail polish, countless eyeshadows, and blush+ blush brushes later; MASTERPIECE. My aunt resented us. My grandma had to repaint the entire room.
Lastly, Asian superstition. I've always grown up with weird crap put on me and weird sayings to cure myself of things. For instance, once, my grandma chased after me with some sort of substance in a bottle to rub on my huge bruise. When I asked her what it was, she said bear bile. BEAR BILE! WHO OWNS THAT?! HOW DO YOU COLLECT THAT? I don't know, but if you ask my grandma, she will have all the answers. to everything. ever. As an adult, I actually have a voice in what I want to be done to my body, but as a child, I had to endure some nonsensical remedies.
As stupid children, my cousin and I loved running in narrow corridors and slamming doors. As a result, we always had bumps and bruises, especially on our heads (OHMYGOSH, IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW) anyways, big bumps on out heads are usually hidable with hair, but not the ones on your forehead. What's alleviates the booboo? Ice pack? kisses? no. HOT KNIVES. I kid you not, after propelling my face into a wall, I'm usually greeted with a hot butcher knife. Held against my will kicking and screaming, my grandma would have just heated a meat cleaver, salted my bump (i'm not making this up) and then touch the flat side onto the bump 3 times. Why. I cannot tell you how counter-intuitive it is to put something painfully hot onto something that was already painful, but look at me now! :)
Monday, November 22, 2010
The Pains of Writing a Blog
Shereen and I were talking on the phone recently and discussed the pains it was to write a blog. Maybe some of you think it's a piece of cake, but maybe.... you aren't trying that hard to be hilarious. This is an all day thing, man! Now during my downtime of facebooking, tumblring, and redditing, I have to flex my mental humor and express it on the canvas that is Blogger. Well, aren't you guys demanding?
So Sherizzle brought up that unintentionally funny blogs are usually the funniest. Why is this? Well, according to the wise Dala Sherama, it's because when you are writing about something funny, you become dependent on the story to bring the giggles where as other unfunny posts rely on your diction and word choice. So. Here's the deal. All two of you reading this blog. Make a word suggestion or question and I'll try to describe a story in my life/make something up to tantalize your otherwise boring 15 minutes you WEREN'T reading my blawg.
Since there's no instant gratification button where I get a random word at this second, I'm going to go to a random word generator
OH WOW!
I just found a random Name generator and rather than writing a story about some stupid object, I will think of a good story about whatever name comes up. Can you imagine if this was a way to name your children? I guess when you're Kate from Jon and Kate plus 8, now, Kate plus 8, now, no-one-cares-about-this-show-Kate-gets-alot-of-plastic-surgery, you kinda start losing your steam on naming kids. I would start numbering them. Which that one family from 9 by design did. She literally named her kid Five. FIVE. according to babycenter.com, these are the children's names:
Wolfgang
Bellamy & Tallulah
Breaker
Five & Holleder
Major
Yep. I can't decide on my favorite. I guess I'll chose none of them because they're all terrible.
So if you are a lost of names and you want your kids to hate you for giving them names they can't pronounce or spell until their mid-teens, go to this family.
Okay. So I've randomly generated some names over and over and I have been dissatisfied. You are given the option to choose a number to denote commoness or obscurity of names. it's on a scale of 1 - 99, 99 being... these are just clicks and grunts. I'm on 20 and I swear I've never heard names like these before.
1. Clayton Postel
2. Jami Orloff
3. Julio Duchesne
4. Cody Hermanson
5. Serena Barlowe
6. Erik Wedel
7. Saundra Billick
8. Saundra Cebula
9. Althea Taitt
10. Kelly Weatherall
Really??? Saundra twice? I never knew a Saundra once in my life. Saundra sounds like a name of a woman that works with you mom at an office. The kind of woman that's really nice, doesn't have kids of her own so she really likes asking your questions and she always asks about you during holiday parties. She also has nothing going for her personality-wise so when your mom changes jobs, she doesn't even bother getting Saundra's personal information to keep in touch with. :( I hope I don't get older and become a Saundra.
OK. apparently. these are names taken from the US census. So these are REAL HUMANS! This being said, I came across this lovely gem of a name
6. Anjanette Drybread
really? Drybread? No one even likes dry bread the noun but use it as a name? How terrible.
Okay. I found the name I will describe. Here we go!
IRIS.
I personally like this name. Names for me has a lot of positive or negative connotation solely based on individuals who had that name that I knew before. For example, I give all Shereens a million chances to wow me with their humor. However, there's nothing like the original :) Well, I think I've met Iris a few times, but we never had a real conversation. Like most people I know, I met them through ultimate frisbee. The first time I saw her, she was playing for Irvine. We didn't think much of them being that they're probably nonathletic, a semi-consistent assumption about asians. YEAH I SAID IT. I CAN BC I'M AZN. Besides that, I thought that the Irvine team was putting up a pretty good fight. When it came time to play against Iris, I realized, MY GAWD, HER MARK IS HUGE! As in, when she's playing defense, the area that she blocks is large. Not because she's big. nononono. She's quick and she reads you well. Damnit! Usually you have a slit in which you can throw through. But no, this girl, she's sooooo good. I was highly impressed with her, and so were many other girls on my team. I also recollect that someone on the Irvine team asked me if I knew "Tay Tay" aka Taylor. I said, "yeah, we're friends" and she goes on saying "OHHH MYYY GAWWWD. Isn't he sooooo hot? OMG. I went to high school with him and I think he's so cute. owitaoiuergliuanerlgiunalerugnlaerugnlanregargerg" And I said, "yeah, I guess? We're like, good friends and we hang out. k bye." Anyways, that's a side salad of the story. The main course is, of course, Iris. Well, a lot of my guy friends liked her. The ones in Irvine. And so naturally, I was jealous. And I wanted to know what was so great about her. And so I facebook stalked her. And she's soooo cute. Really. this girl is just the whole package. After knowing her but not actually knowing her because every factual thing I gleaned about her it through facebook, she came up in conversation that I had with my good friend, Danica. Danica told me that she tried hitting on Iris once but Iris has been dating her girlfriend steadily for a while. WHOA. GIRLFRIEND? And that's why, children, you shouldn't always be jealous of other people, because in the end, they might have not been a threat all along. Also, another moral of the story is that through persistent facebook stalking and talking about those people behind their back, you find information about them that makes you feel better about yourself. Kidding aside, she's a really great person, from what I've been told. And she really is adorable. d'awwwww :)
And I'm semi-content with this blog. You're right Shereen!
So Sherizzle brought up that unintentionally funny blogs are usually the funniest. Why is this? Well, according to the wise Dala Sherama, it's because when you are writing about something funny, you become dependent on the story to bring the giggles where as other unfunny posts rely on your diction and word choice. So. Here's the deal. All two of you reading this blog. Make a word suggestion or question and I'll try to describe a story in my life/make something up to tantalize your otherwise boring 15 minutes you WEREN'T reading my blawg.
Since there's no instant gratification button where I get a random word at this second, I'm going to go to a random word generator
OH WOW!
I just found a random Name generator and rather than writing a story about some stupid object, I will think of a good story about whatever name comes up. Can you imagine if this was a way to name your children? I guess when you're Kate from Jon and Kate plus 8, now, Kate plus 8, now, no-one-cares-about-this-show-Kate-gets-alot-of-plastic-surgery, you kinda start losing your steam on naming kids. I would start numbering them. Which that one family from 9 by design did. She literally named her kid Five. FIVE. according to babycenter.com, these are the children's names:
Wolfgang
Bellamy & Tallulah
Breaker
Five & Holleder
Major
Yep. I can't decide on my favorite. I guess I'll chose none of them because they're all terrible.
So if you are a lost of names and you want your kids to hate you for giving them names they can't pronounce or spell until their mid-teens, go to this family.
Okay. So I've randomly generated some names over and over and I have been dissatisfied. You are given the option to choose a number to denote commoness or obscurity of names. it's on a scale of 1 - 99, 99 being... these are just clicks and grunts. I'm on 20 and I swear I've never heard names like these before.
1. Clayton Postel
2. Jami Orloff
3. Julio Duchesne
4. Cody Hermanson
5. Serena Barlowe
6. Erik Wedel
7. Saundra Billick
8. Saundra Cebula
9. Althea Taitt
10. Kelly Weatherall
Really??? Saundra twice? I never knew a Saundra once in my life. Saundra sounds like a name of a woman that works with you mom at an office. The kind of woman that's really nice, doesn't have kids of her own so she really likes asking your questions and she always asks about you during holiday parties. She also has nothing going for her personality-wise so when your mom changes jobs, she doesn't even bother getting Saundra's personal information to keep in touch with. :( I hope I don't get older and become a Saundra.
OK. apparently. these are names taken from the US census. So these are REAL HUMANS! This being said, I came across this lovely gem of a name
6. Anjanette Drybread
really? Drybread? No one even likes dry bread the noun but use it as a name? How terrible.
Okay. I found the name I will describe. Here we go!
IRIS.
I personally like this name. Names for me has a lot of positive or negative connotation solely based on individuals who had that name that I knew before. For example, I give all Shereens a million chances to wow me with their humor. However, there's nothing like the original :) Well, I think I've met Iris a few times, but we never had a real conversation. Like most people I know, I met them through ultimate frisbee. The first time I saw her, she was playing for Irvine. We didn't think much of them being that they're probably nonathletic, a semi-consistent assumption about asians. YEAH I SAID IT. I CAN BC I'M AZN. Besides that, I thought that the Irvine team was putting up a pretty good fight. When it came time to play against Iris, I realized, MY GAWD, HER MARK IS HUGE! As in, when she's playing defense, the area that she blocks is large. Not because she's big. nononono. She's quick and she reads you well. Damnit! Usually you have a slit in which you can throw through. But no, this girl, she's sooooo good. I was highly impressed with her, and so were many other girls on my team. I also recollect that someone on the Irvine team asked me if I knew "Tay Tay" aka Taylor. I said, "yeah, we're friends" and she goes on saying "OHHH MYYY GAWWWD. Isn't he sooooo hot? OMG. I went to high school with him and I think he's so cute. owitaoiuergliuanerlgiunalerugnlaerugnlanregargerg" And I said, "yeah, I guess? We're like, good friends and we hang out. k bye." Anyways, that's a side salad of the story. The main course is, of course, Iris. Well, a lot of my guy friends liked her. The ones in Irvine. And so naturally, I was jealous. And I wanted to know what was so great about her. And so I facebook stalked her. And she's soooo cute. Really. this girl is just the whole package. After knowing her but not actually knowing her because every factual thing I gleaned about her it through facebook, she came up in conversation that I had with my good friend, Danica. Danica told me that she tried hitting on Iris once but Iris has been dating her girlfriend steadily for a while. WHOA. GIRLFRIEND? And that's why, children, you shouldn't always be jealous of other people, because in the end, they might have not been a threat all along. Also, another moral of the story is that through persistent facebook stalking and talking about those people behind their back, you find information about them that makes you feel better about yourself. Kidding aside, she's a really great person, from what I've been told. And she really is adorable. d'awwwww :)
And I'm semi-content with this blog. You're right Shereen!
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
another note on happiness
Wooo! Do you like the B-52s? Do you like Speed? Well I have neither. BUT. If I were to make a band that you can boil and shoot up into your veins in order to give you an earth shattering high, Architecture in Helsinki would be that band. Listen to their music and I DARE you to not be happy.
I mean, I wasn't planning on dancing, but my foot literally twitched to the rhythm for a split second.
On that note of happiness, I wanted to make a list of things that cause inevitable happiness. I've been thinking about lots of different types of lists but being that I want to tantalize you with images as well as words (so. hot.) those posts will have to wait because my computer hates my camera's memory card. :( Also, some other lists are in the making because I wanted them to be super meaty. Speaking of. I just ate a burger and if I die from a cardiac arrest, you know it's because of Tommy J's AMAZING burgers
Jumping on jumpy things
Think about it. I don't have to. I know jumping is great! I've become an expert jumping picture model and so have my friends.
Try doing a jumping picture. OK. Take another. 9 out of 10 times, your faces are the same. Why? I don't know. Why do we open out mouths when we put on mascara and why do we open and close our mouthes when we cut with scissors? It's just human nature.
You know what else you should try? STAR JUMPS. They're supposed to help with agility so we always had to do them for our track workouts. Seriously, I cannot stop laughing when I do star jumps. It's probably because I'm at a delusional state having done a track workout and all I want to do is lay in a grave. That doesn't sound like it would make you happy. But really, look at this fit looking lady
She probably has a 7-video exercise series at the low low price of 5 easy payments of 15.49 not including shipping and handling and if you call now she'll throw in the magic chopper. But seriously though, jump on your bed, or a hoppy couch, or party crash that 8-year-old's party down the street. Jumping is fun fun fun fun and will make you smile sooo freakin hard.
free things
When you go to a convention, or a job fair, or a place where they give free (and mostly unnecessary) swag, what happens? You go straight to the booth that's giving out free reusable grocery bags that-you'll-never-use-because-you-always-forget-to-get-them-when-you-go-to-the-store-therefore-defeating-the-original-purpose in order to put more free crap you'll never use. Cool. Sucky frisbee with a company name imprinted in it. 7 thousand pens. Post-its. But you know what. Free stuff makes people happy. It's true. Like, who doesn't love it when you go to costco around lunch time and they're giving out free samples?! It makes you happy enough to think that 5 pounds of raw almonds are the best thing in order to top off an amazing day prompted by the free samples. But really, free things are awesome when you really don't expect it. It's great at college because they assume we're starving students so they give us pizzas and Monster drinks. Why is Amuricaaa fat again?
clean clothes
think about it. after showering, you love wearing fresh clothes that don't smell like an animal crawled inside, defecated, ate it, then proceeded to die. Extra points when they're crisp. Bonus extra points when you fit them.
right clicking
do it. if you can (sorry mac users) there's a split second of euphoria. I don't understand it either, but you have this feeling that something amazing is coming, and it's usually in the form of a drop down menu. Talk about getting your kicks.
new color pencils/markers
This is so undeniable. Come on, you don't have to use that stub of a pencil that used to be black (obvi the most used color) and when markers are SO SHARP and you can basically trace the outline an ant with it. And you use all these things at an angle in order to preserve them in their original state. Then you have kid cousins who think that drawing hard will make their drawings look better but NO. IT STILL LOOKS SQUIGGLES. But opening crayola markers, It's perfect, the top is perfectly creased and you know no other finger has dug under in order to pull the top off. There's no box face crease from opening it too many times. And the colors are so vibrant. I'm pretty sure i'm going to marry a crayola color pack.
There's a thousand other things that make happiness happen. Like alcohol. But these are the ones I can think of now. What makes you jovial?
 |
| how can you not love a person who made a triangle costume out of PAPER?! |
I mean, I wasn't planning on dancing, but my foot literally twitched to the rhythm for a split second.
On that note of happiness, I wanted to make a list of things that cause inevitable happiness. I've been thinking about lots of different types of lists but being that I want to tantalize you with images as well as words (so. hot.) those posts will have to wait because my computer hates my camera's memory card. :( Also, some other lists are in the making because I wanted them to be super meaty. Speaking of. I just ate a burger and if I die from a cardiac arrest, you know it's because of Tommy J's AMAZING burgers
Jumping on jumpy things
Think about it. I don't have to. I know jumping is great! I've become an expert jumping picture model and so have my friends.
 |
| WEE! |
Try doing a jumping picture. OK. Take another. 9 out of 10 times, your faces are the same. Why? I don't know. Why do we open out mouths when we put on mascara and why do we open and close our mouthes when we cut with scissors? It's just human nature.
You know what else you should try? STAR JUMPS. They're supposed to help with agility so we always had to do them for our track workouts. Seriously, I cannot stop laughing when I do star jumps. It's probably because I'm at a delusional state having done a track workout and all I want to do is lay in a grave. That doesn't sound like it would make you happy. But really, look at this fit looking lady
free things
When you go to a convention, or a job fair, or a place where they give free (and mostly unnecessary) swag, what happens? You go straight to the booth that's giving out free reusable grocery bags that-you'll-never-use-because-you-always-forget-to-get-them-when-you-go-to-the-store-therefore-defeating-the-original-purpose in order to put more free crap you'll never use. Cool. Sucky frisbee with a company name imprinted in it. 7 thousand pens. Post-its. But you know what. Free stuff makes people happy. It's true. Like, who doesn't love it when you go to costco around lunch time and they're giving out free samples?! It makes you happy enough to think that 5 pounds of raw almonds are the best thing in order to top off an amazing day prompted by the free samples. But really, free things are awesome when you really don't expect it. It's great at college because they assume we're starving students so they give us pizzas and Monster drinks. Why is Amuricaaa fat again?
clean clothes
think about it. after showering, you love wearing fresh clothes that don't smell like an animal crawled inside, defecated, ate it, then proceeded to die. Extra points when they're crisp. Bonus extra points when you fit them.
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| you know what is clean? Bina and I because we fit in a dryer |
right clicking
do it. if you can (sorry mac users) there's a split second of euphoria. I don't understand it either, but you have this feeling that something amazing is coming, and it's usually in the form of a drop down menu. Talk about getting your kicks.
new color pencils/markers
This is so undeniable. Come on, you don't have to use that stub of a pencil that used to be black (obvi the most used color) and when markers are SO SHARP and you can basically trace the outline an ant with it. And you use all these things at an angle in order to preserve them in their original state. Then you have kid cousins who think that drawing hard will make their drawings look better but NO. IT STILL LOOKS SQUIGGLES. But opening crayola markers, It's perfect, the top is perfectly creased and you know no other finger has dug under in order to pull the top off. There's no box face crease from opening it too many times. And the colors are so vibrant. I'm pretty sure i'm going to marry a crayola color pack.
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| Nadia's sweet 2010 halloween costume. be jealous |
Monday, November 15, 2010
Not being funny
I have a few posts that I'm working on. But I just wanted to reaffirm my happiness (which will mostly result in sadness due to jinxing myself and because you can only have a run of happiness for so long.)
Friday evening I went to a hipster party which involved me wearing clothes that I wear often. (really? it's just cardigans and skinny jeans. everyone is a hipster) I was being an awesome DJ when the people who owned the laptop decided that they wanted to play obscure crappy music (read: most hipster music) so no one wanted to dance. People requested that I change the music and as I was making a dying party better, they asked me to not. OK. WHO THINKS MAN IN THE MIRROR by Michael Jackson is a good dance song. I see no hands. yeah, because it's a terrible song to grind to. Almost got in a fight. Girl sounded like she was going to cry. Then I left and I felt justified. Then she started changing the music to things I would have played. Whatever. Never trust a white DJ. Us brown folk should be listened to more often. Just saying
Saturday - Went to visit Anjali and Brian in Berkeley and ate at the cheese counter. Awesome! I was so excited to see them and I was dancing as I went to give them hugs. Made people laugh and got really bad gas from delicious pizza. It was worth it. They went for a bike ride and I drank coffee. perfect!
Sunday - Practice Triathlon where I was yelling supportive things (and some other stuff), took out lane lines, and danced on cars. Typical. Then I studied at more coffee shops with lovely Heidi and Becca, finished an essay, and applied for a jawb. Then I had an IM game and I ROCKED. we played savage with girl so I was in every point. I scored 3 I think, layout (unsuccessfully) at the endzone which won me a lot of love. 2 Ds (pretty pathetic). But to be honest, those girls were fast. Then I baked a cake. It was chocolate
Anyways. It ended well but now I shall regret my happiness because I didn't focus more on school. WAH WAH. K. Night
Friday evening I went to a hipster party which involved me wearing clothes that I wear often. (really? it's just cardigans and skinny jeans. everyone is a hipster) I was being an awesome DJ when the people who owned the laptop decided that they wanted to play obscure crappy music (read: most hipster music) so no one wanted to dance. People requested that I change the music and as I was making a dying party better, they asked me to not. OK. WHO THINKS MAN IN THE MIRROR by Michael Jackson is a good dance song. I see no hands. yeah, because it's a terrible song to grind to. Almost got in a fight. Girl sounded like she was going to cry. Then I left and I felt justified. Then she started changing the music to things I would have played. Whatever. Never trust a white DJ. Us brown folk should be listened to more often. Just saying
Saturday - Went to visit Anjali and Brian in Berkeley and ate at the cheese counter. Awesome! I was so excited to see them and I was dancing as I went to give them hugs. Made people laugh and got really bad gas from delicious pizza. It was worth it. They went for a bike ride and I drank coffee. perfect!
Sunday - Practice Triathlon where I was yelling supportive things (and some other stuff), took out lane lines, and danced on cars. Typical. Then I studied at more coffee shops with lovely Heidi and Becca, finished an essay, and applied for a jawb. Then I had an IM game and I ROCKED. we played savage with girl so I was in every point. I scored 3 I think, layout (unsuccessfully) at the endzone which won me a lot of love. 2 Ds (pretty pathetic). But to be honest, those girls were fast. Then I baked a cake. It was chocolate
Anyways. It ended well but now I shall regret my happiness because I didn't focus more on school. WAH WAH. K. Night
Thursday, November 11, 2010
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
inappropriate crushes
Well as you can imagine. This post is about people I fantasize getting married to, and that's the extent of it. Because in real life, these relationship wouldn't exist because I have standards to keep (read: not that desperate yet).
We're all guilty of having crushes on celebrities. You know, all those guilty pleasures of the chiseled bodied, hair swooping, hunky hunks. But enough about talking about Justin Beiber, I'm trying to make a generalized picture of perfection here. It may be a combination of talking about relationships (or lack thereof) that has prompted this post, but I think it's hilarious. I usually don't divulge on my crushes, but these crushes are so stupid that I can't help but make myself laugh about them. And if you are the following individuals, please, don't think I'm creepy. Be flattered that I think you're somewhat attractive and I've never thought much about acting on a relationship because it would have embarassingly weird with an extra serving of awkward sauce. Anyways, here goes nothing. And please, a restraining order won't be necessary
Brad
CHMS advisor
Needless to say. My heart broke into a million pieces when I found out that he left Davis for family in Detroit (or wherever he is, I forget). Yes, he's my advisor. And I loved dropping by just to say hello to him whenever I was near his office. Secretly, I knew he loved me. Today I chatted with him online (the primary mode of communication in order to get advising help) and everytime the little chat box had _____ is typing... my heart was palpitating a million beats a minute. He was sooo nice and he's so adorable. A friend of mine even went as far as to saying she went into the Chemical Engineering major because she thought he was so cute. This forbidden love must have ate him inside. I like to secretly believe that the reason he left was because his attraction towards me began to put a strain in his daily functioning. He left in the dead of summer, when I wasn't around. All signs point to my theory. I also theorize that there's a hair harvester that takes all my leg and arm hair of my body which explains my non-existant furriness. So you be the judge of the validity of my theories.
Sean Jeffcoach
What can I say. He's adorable! It might be due to the fact that we constantly ran into each other and kept forgetting each other's names. Or the fact that we had a foil ball fight (true life. I didn't fantasize this this time!). or that time I kept running into him because of coincidence (OR FATE). Anyways, if you ever read this, Sean, you're super cute and I'm sure you already know this.
There are many problems with this situation. He's a baby. If only I was born a few years younger. Dang. There are so many instances for that. I really hope I don't grow up to be a gross pedohpile like Mr. Herbert from family guy
I think sean is so cute because he's tall and skinny and he has such a cute smile and his eyes are so small! Is this me loving the asian in nonasian people? I don't know, about my psychological views of handsomeness. All I know is that Sean is a babe.
Aladdin
Probably one of the hottest Disney character of all time. The Streetrat of of our souls. Aladdin.
Think about it, he lies in order to be with you, he talks to monkeys, he potentially has fleas.... oh wait... But look at the picture!
Adorable. He's hungry so he stole some bread in which he had to do an obstacle course that is Agrabah in order to finally get some mean solders to land on some manure which probably made him EVEN HUNGRIER. Then he gave it to some kids. WHOA MAN. THAT'S A KEEPER. except for the whole kleptomaniac point. But hey, he'll always provide for you.
But the weird thing is that, growing up. I SWEAR I thought Simba from the Lion King was hot. WHAT WAS WRONG WITH ME? can you say 'bestiality' ?
I think my adolescent mishap was due to the fact that I was on the brink of hormonal explosion and I loved Nick Carter from Backstreet boys. Think about it. They have similar hair styles. And you know it's all about the hair when you're 9 years old.
Seriously. THE HAIR. I'm just saying.
We're all guilty of having crushes on celebrities. You know, all those guilty pleasures of the chiseled bodied, hair swooping, hunky hunks. But enough about talking about Justin Beiber, I'm trying to make a generalized picture of perfection here. It may be a combination of talking about relationships (or lack thereof) that has prompted this post, but I think it's hilarious. I usually don't divulge on my crushes, but these crushes are so stupid that I can't help but make myself laugh about them. And if you are the following individuals, please, don't think I'm creepy. Be flattered that I think you're somewhat attractive and I've never thought much about acting on a relationship because it would have embarassingly weird with an extra serving of awkward sauce. Anyways, here goes nothing. And please, a restraining order won't be necessary
Brad
CHMS advisor
Needless to say. My heart broke into a million pieces when I found out that he left Davis for family in Detroit (or wherever he is, I forget). Yes, he's my advisor. And I loved dropping by just to say hello to him whenever I was near his office. Secretly, I knew he loved me. Today I chatted with him online (the primary mode of communication in order to get advising help) and everytime the little chat box had _____ is typing... my heart was palpitating a million beats a minute. He was sooo nice and he's so adorable. A friend of mine even went as far as to saying she went into the Chemical Engineering major because she thought he was so cute. This forbidden love must have ate him inside. I like to secretly believe that the reason he left was because his attraction towards me began to put a strain in his daily functioning. He left in the dead of summer, when I wasn't around. All signs point to my theory. I also theorize that there's a hair harvester that takes all my leg and arm hair of my body which explains my non-existant furriness. So you be the judge of the validity of my theories.
 | |||
| awwwww so cute! |
 |
| Yeah... we're facebook friends.... DONT JUDGE (me. you can judge him all you want) |
Sean Jeffcoach
What can I say. He's adorable! It might be due to the fact that we constantly ran into each other and kept forgetting each other's names. Or the fact that we had a foil ball fight (true life. I didn't fantasize this this time!). or that time I kept running into him because of coincidence (OR FATE). Anyways, if you ever read this, Sean, you're super cute and I'm sure you already know this.
There are many problems with this situation. He's a baby. If only I was born a few years younger. Dang. There are so many instances for that. I really hope I don't grow up to be a gross pedohpile like Mr. Herbert from family guyI think sean is so cute because he's tall and skinny and he has such a cute smile and his eyes are so small! Is this me loving the asian in nonasian people? I don't know, about my psychological views of handsomeness. All I know is that Sean is a babe.
 | |
| The one on the right. It's def the smile. |
Probably one of the hottest Disney character of all time. The Streetrat of of our souls. Aladdin.
Think about it, he lies in order to be with you, he talks to monkeys, he potentially has fleas.... oh wait... But look at the picture!
Adorable. He's hungry so he stole some bread in which he had to do an obstacle course that is Agrabah in order to finally get some mean solders to land on some manure which probably made him EVEN HUNGRIER. Then he gave it to some kids. WHOA MAN. THAT'S A KEEPER. except for the whole kleptomaniac point. But hey, he'll always provide for you.
But the weird thing is that, growing up. I SWEAR I thought Simba from the Lion King was hot. WHAT WAS WRONG WITH ME? can you say 'bestiality' ?
 | |
| dashing. |
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Blood
Today I donated blood. Awesome right? Nope. It always takes too long. DAMNIT I just want to save a life with my (almost) universally accepted blood. (O+ ). Typical asian blood type. They ignore the fact that I'm super lardy and probably filter out the bacon bits that is suspended in my blood.
Think about it, blood is precious and whenever a natural disaster happens, Red Cross always begs for blood. But they mostly beg for money.
You'd think that donating such a fine commodity would be given more perks. No. You get a shirt and a bunch of snacks. GREAT. The wait is also ridiculous. And let's not even get started with bone marrow. Isn't there a way you don't have to use a needle the size of a turkey baster? I'm pretty sure I'm doing you a favor. Today, however, was special because my roommate got me a fast pass and I didn't have to wait in line. YAYY.Anyways. So the problem is that the layer of lard right under my skin seems to hinder vein finders (nurses). There is one particular vein that's a bit easier to find and I only know so because it's been tapped so many times, I'm sure its calloused a cartridge exterior by now. Anyways, untouched for a year (allograph) my veins let its guard down and it was stabbed. Sucker. Ok, well the problem was, the nurse didn't believe me that it was a good vein and she poked my other arm and I started bruising and blood flowed in a tarlike fashion. Ugh. I TOLD HER. Anyways, the other arm got milked and after a stressful time I had to go to discussion to turn in my Lab report (WHICH TOOK FOREVER TO FINISH) because I had a TA that considered 10 seconds after the start of class as late. . So after I was bandaged, I ran out of there. OH MY GAWD. It was like being drunk and being the thurstiest you've ever been and sweating a bunch and your heart is palpitating to the song, "Sandstorm" (33 seconds in) I had to stop but it was awesome because I used it as a convincing argument for my ta to accept my lab on-time. Then I drank half a bottle of water and felt better.
Think about it, blood is precious and whenever a natural disaster happens, Red Cross always begs for blood. But they mostly beg for money.
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| You're lucky your car doesn't run on HP Black ink. I don't want to get started about colored ink. |
Monday, November 1, 2010
AM I FAYMUS?
HI GUYS! Blogger stats told me the blog had 18 views today! YAYYYY 10 might be mine but still. AWESOME! thanks bina, shereen, erin, and audrey (and maybe vicky sometimes i don't know if you count because you have ccs feed something technological). wooooooo keep refreshing.
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